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Thursday, May 30, 2013 | 17:01 | 0 comments

Originally found on Facebook

Recently, I've read an interview from a plus-sized Gyaru about her experiences and it made me think. I've mentioned that I didn't want to post my Outfit of the Day segment until I felt that I was confident enough to wear the things I want to wear.

But you see, I've been on a diet since January! The diet works like this: I eat 6 meals a day (but well portion sized) and then when I had some extra time (since I would go to class 3 days a week and had an online class), I would do some exercise. Billy actually set up this diet himself because he knows how I eat and what I actually need versus what most people needed. And for a while, it actually worked! I was starting to slim down - my thighs and legs, in particular, started to finally shrink!

This is how it looked:

07 to 10AM:
1-2 Bananas
1 Breakfast Bar
1 Protein Shake
1 Bowl of Cereal 

12 to 01PM:
1 Slice of Pizza
1 Taco Salad (only eat half of it)
1/2 Grilled Cheese Sandwich
1/2 Hamburger
If at home: eat half of what I would normally eat.
Note: Can drink juice. No soda!

03 to 04PM:
Poptarts eat 1 and a half
1 Small Bag of Chips
1 Bag of Nuts
Note: Only Water

06 to 07PM:
Eat any leftover food from earlier
Salad or Poptart
2 fruit any choice

09 to 10PM:
Smaller portion of whatever the dinner is

11 to 12PM
Eat 1 Fruit
Small bag of chips
Snack bar

Of course, I don't eat all of those at once! Those are just some of the choices I have and I can alternate.

However, I stopped exercising for a couple of weeks because I had to take care of some finals and I had to study. I didn't gain weight as, even now, I'm stuck to my actual meal plans. I'm just really determined to lose this weight! I mean, even though I've mentioned before how I'm stuck with only 10-15lbs to go, I actually feel like I need some extra motivation to do it.

I've wanted to lose weight because I want to feel good. I don't feel good with how my body is right now. I don't feel confident with how my body is now. Sometimes I compare myself to the other Gyaru or models who are Latina as well (let's face it - I'm not Asian and will never be Asian and will never be that petite) but all it does is get me down. The continuous motivation I have is: to feel good - to look good.

So now, to do something different, I'm presenting my insecurities out there like this. Maybe somehow I can read back on this and think, "Wow, I'm glad I'm past this".

I really hope that I can push myself to lose that 10-15lbs. I hope one day that I will reach my weight goal!

What's your motivation for self-improvement?

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